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Warning – Avengers Endgame is not going to be Peetime friendly

Dan Gardner
Read Time:3 Minute, 49 Second
Avengers: Endagem-Hold The Spoilers
Did we say no spoilers?

You might be surprised to learn that finding Peetimes in a movie isn’t the hardest part of the RunPee job. Ofttimes we find great Peetimes but get stuck on picking out the best Peetime Cue: a brief line of dialog — or description of some action — that stands out to signify the beginning of a Peetime.

A good Cue might be: When Jack says, “Can I have the extra-spicy onions on my burger?”

It’s short, distinctive, and non-spoilery.


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An example of a bad Cue would be: When Jack chokes to death on spicy onions. 

I don’t think I have to explain why we could never, ever, use a Cue like that.

HULK NO LIKE SPOILERS

There’s a lot of middle ground we struggle with, and try to find ways to describe the important, almighty Cue, without giving something away.

How we avoid spoilers in our Peetime Cues

Like in Avengers: Infinity War, one of the Cues is: Thanos says to *someone*, “I like you,” then vanishes. That *someone* was Star Lord, but if we used his name, you would have seen the Cue and thought to yourself, “Well great; I guess I know that Star Lord and Thanos meet at some point. Thanks for spoiling that.”

Later in the movie there was a great Cue: Black Panther says, “And get this man a shield.”

That line was delivered time and time again in the movie trailer, so you knew it was coming. It’s a great character payoff, with a multi-film buildup.

Now, that brings us to Avengers: Endgame. Right off the bat we know none of the Cues can start with: Spiderman says…

Spiderman got Snapped. Everyone presumes he’s going to be un-Snapped, somehow. But we don’t know for sure, and we don’t know when. So we can take his name, and everyone else who got Snapped, off the Cue list.

For that matter, we don’t know if Thor, Iron Man, Banner/Hulk, Captain, et al., will survive. Using their names in a Peetime Cue — at least after the midpoint of the movie– is problematic. We hear time and again from fans, begging them not to spoil anything. As big fans ourselves, we get it.

Whose Name can be used in a Peetime Cue?

At least we can assume Captain Marvel has a big part to play in the upcoming MCU movies, so I think her name is fair game. Beyond that, expect a lot of Cues that read something like: *Someone* says, “Hurry — throw me the sonic screwdriver.” And *Someone else* replies, “I got it, but the battery’s dead.” 🙂

If that wasn’t a big enough challenge, I admit it — finding good Peetimes in last year’s Avengers: Infinity War was no picnic. It was undoubtedly the hardest MCU movie to do Peetimes for so far, mostly because there were so many simultaneous story-lines to juggle.

Music montages are a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow for Peetimes, but I think we can safely assume there will be no music montages in Endgame, unless Star Lord hatches a plan to distract Thanos via dance-off at some point…Oh wait, Star Lord got snapped. Well, there goes that.

We will have Movie Pee Breaks before the opening night of Endgame

Rest assured, we’re going to make our best effort to find good times for you to make a pee break. Shanee Edwards, our Hollywood film critic, will provide us with Peetimes days prior to the public opening. She doesn’t do Peetimes for many movies, and she’ll be working alone, but she knows her stuff and will give everyone going to see the movie opening night something to work with.

Then we have four People, myself (Dan), Jill, RunPee Mom, and Vera, all seeing the movie opening night so we can collaborate on choosing the very best Peetimes. Friday morning we’re going back see the movie again so we can come home and polish the Peetimes until they shine like an Infinity Stone. Plus we’ll get Peetime feedback from Dana and Shani over the weekend.

I tell everyone who does Peetimes for RunPee: we’re only as good as our last Peetimes. That’s never been more true than when the fate of the universe is at stake.

#WhatEverItTakes

Did YOU Survive The Snap? You may as well get this over with…

A Open Response to Kevin Feige (re: Using the Bathroom During Endgame)

Avengers Infinity War – Whose Fault is the Snap?

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