Movie Review – The Machine

Read Time:1 Minute, 36 Second


When you’re trying to figure out what movie to see this weekend, I have some crucial advice for you. Being a huge Bert Kreischer fan, I was horribly disappointed with The Machine. Don’t get me wrong, there was some of his humor but nothing like what I was expecting. The humor is more so in the background. It’s mainly about the Russian mob getting their stuff back. The amount of family members involved with their gang gets confusing. At one point, I couldn’t tell who the bad guys were and who were the good guys. Come to find out, there weren’t any good guys, really.

Overall, it was just too convoluted for my taste. Give me some Bert ripping off his shirt and making fun of his family; that’s what I was hoping for.

-----Content continues below------

The World's Most Indispensable Movie App

The RunPee app tells you the best times to run & pee during a movie so you don't miss the best scenes.

As seen on
Download the RunPee app for free:
Get the RunPee app at the Google Play Store       Get the RunPee app at the Google Play Store
Read more about the RunPee app.

On the upside, Kreischer is a good actor. He was fun to watch as was Mark Hamill. He played Albert, Bert’s Dad. What a strange, quirky fellow. That was another plus to the movie. I have to be honest here, the movie actually bored me to sleep. I nodded off, luckily, my husband was there to wake me up. I’m sure I’ll get some flack about this, but I really don’t think The Machine is worth the ticket price.

Grade: D+

About The Peetimes: I would recommend the 1st Peetime. It’s a little bit longer and has less humor than the 2nd Peetime.

There are extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of The Machine.

Rated: (R) Some Sexual References | Pervasive Language | Drug Use | Strong Violence
Genres: Action, Comedy
Starring: Mark Hamill, Martyn Ford, Bert Kreischer
Director: Peter Atencio
Writer(s): Kevin Biegel, Scotty Landes
Language: English
Country: United States

Bert’s drunken past catches up with him 20 years down the road when he and his father are kidnapped by those Bert wronged 20 years ago while drunk on a college semester abroad in Russia.

Don’t miss your favorite movie moments because you have to pee or need a snack. Use the RunPee app (Androidor iPhone) when you go to the movies. We have Peetimes for all wide release films every week, including A Haunting in Venice, Expend4bles, Gran Turismo, Oppenhiemer, Barbie, and coming soon The Creator and Killers of the Flower Moon, and many others. We have literally thousands of Peetimes—from classic movies through today's blockbusters. You can also keep up with movie news and reviews on our blog, or by following us on Twitter @RunPee. If there's a new film out there, we've got your bladder covered.

Leave a Reply