And then the failing grades…
The dreaded F. These are the abominations littering the sticky cinema screening floor. They waste everyone’s time and money — whether it’s the production studio, the actors or director, the poor crew, and (especially) the viewers. Could they be any worse?
They aren’t worth going straight to video. They aren’t worth seeing free on Netflix.
Really. Rewatch your other favorite shows again and thank us later.
A quick roundup of how to grade movies
We’ve now covered every letter grade here at RunPee and our guidelines for how movies — from transcendent to abysmal — earn their rankings.
I don’t think earning an F+ is any kind of achievement. This is probably why we don’t seem to have any. Generally, if we think if there’s any kind of positive feature in said flick, we bump a film up to a ‘safety’ grade of D-.
A Solid F
If we were the Emperors of Movies, our thumbs down suggests someone’s been executed. Or at least sacked. Said film might have an attractive actor or normally reliable director who just can’t make the movie work, for whatever reason, or some hint of a story that should have been good, but in the end was entirely disappointing.
That’s the bottom line: If you walk away entirely disappointed, you probably sat through an F.
Then, the lowest of the low: F-
We’re an opinionated lot. So we actually have more F- grades than you’d think. I don’t think I personally gave anything a grade this low, but we do have it…and this is reserved for films with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. No goodness. They aren’t even so bad they’re good, unlike The Room.
These travesties are actually offensive, making them worse then entirely disappointing. We’re fairly certain the celluloid needs to be shot behind the barn. Because: rabies.
Was your movie awful AND offensive? F- it is.
Every F grade movie at RunPee:
Want the behind-the-scenes-info on our lowest rankings? Here we go. We apologize if you liked something we panned.
Actually…we aren’t very sorry. We sit through a LOT of movies to get Peetimes for the world. But you can argue in the comments below about why you liked one of our F grades, and we promise to respect you for it. Even if you enjoyed Hellboy 2.
(Links lead to our RunPee Family reviews.)
|Resident Evil: Retribution||F|
|The Quiet Ones||F-|
|Woman In Black 2 Angel Of Death||F-|
|The Neon Demon||F|
|It Comes at Night||F|
|Valley of Bones||F-|
|Til Death Do Us Part||F|
|Super Troopers 2||F-|
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Co-Creator of RunPee, Chief of Operations, Content Director, and Managing Editor. RunPee Jilly likes galaxy-spanning sci fi, superhero sagas, fantasy films, YA dystopians, action thrillers, chick flicks, and zany comedies, in that order…and possesses an inspiringly small bladder. In fact, that little bladder sparked the creation of RunPee. (Good thing she’s learned to hold it.)