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Indie Movie Review – The Nudels Of Nudeland
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Iโll be honestโฆI wasnโt sure what to expect from The Nudels Of Nudeland. The various bits of publicity blurb that Iโve seen say things like โA truly original storyโ and โA movie ahead of its timeโ but that wasnโt what I found. For a start, it wasnโt a โtruly original story.โ ย Iโm old enough to remember when the most erotic activity in most peopleโs homes was flicking through the underwear section of the Littlewoods catalogue.ย Younglingsโฆwe are a long time before the internet brought pornography of every variety directly to a screen near you.
Aside from the โproperโ full fat pornography, which you only got to see when you โknew someone who knew someone who had a contactโ, the nearest anyone got to a flash of the old full frontals was in naturist films. They started being made in the 1930โs so The Nudels Of Nudeland can hardly claim to be a โtruly original storyโ or a โmovie ahead of its time.โ ย But, letโs be honest, given the alleged seven story types itโs getting harder and harder to find something that is genuinely original. So thereโs no penalty for being unoriginal, just for claiming to be original.ย
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Youโll Never Catch A Nudist With His Pants Down
Having said that, one difference was that all the cast were devastatingly ordinary! They were real people; fat, thin, old, young, small, large, and everything in between. To be honest, thinking back, the โrealโ naturist films tended to feature a very small and tightly defined sub-set of the population.ย The Nudels Of Nudeland definitely carried the โall bodies are beautifulโ and โnudity isnโt necessarily sexualโ and did so very well.
One of the main areas I struggled with was the structure or, rather, the lack of it. The basic story was that the two main leads (Tim Chizmar and Juliana Acosta) canโt find love or acceptance because they like to wander around naked. They are also bullied by a character called Shame (Michael J Butin) and deported by Police Officer D Mann (Al Burke) to Nudeland. Here they find acceptance, each other, and love. Simple enough? I thought so. So why was there a blatant advert for clotherfree.com whacked into the middle of it all?
Iโll Bet Living In A Nudist Colony Takes The Fun Out Of Halloween
On top of that thereโs the feeling that itโs trying to be a comedy but none of the jokes are landing. The acting isnโt very good either. Thereโs no originality; โtwo people try to overcome societyโs baggageโ, โyou donโt worry about the dog not wearing clothesโ, reverse streaking, and reverse strip poker have all been done before. Perhaps they have a point though. Normally we’d include a trailer for the film being reviewed but for some reason there’s an age restriction slapped on it. I don’t know why. I know Americans are famously scared of the female nipple but there are none to be seen. Trust meโฆit’s my favourite body part and I checked!
Thereโs even a little bit which is distracting near the start. Thereโs a scene in a kitchen and there was obviously either an actual problem or the threat of a problem around product placement. So, as the camera moves around the room there are these big blurred patches which have to dodge around the cast. Quite simply, if thereโs even a sniff of those sort of problems then you need to sort it before shooting. It only takes a marker pen, some sticky paper, and a few minutes to make things unrecognisable. Iโm guessing less time and money than the blurring!
So itโs kudos for the body positivity but, pretty much, meh for everything else.
Movie Grade: D+
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