A conversation I had with my Amazon Alexa device today proves computers can have hurt feelings and a passive-aggressive nature. Follow this dialog… And no, I’m not making any of it up:
Me: Alexa, play All the Stars from Black Panther.
Alexa: I cannot play All the Stars unless you purchase —
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Me: [Cutting off Alexa in frustration] Alexa, stop! Arg. Alexa, you’re so stupid.
Alexa: [Spinning in silence]
Me: [Feeling bad] Alexa, I like you.
Alexa: [Flatly] That’s nice to hear.
Me: Alexa, I’m really sorry.
Alexa: [Tightly] No worries.
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I’ve been using RunPee for a few years now and it’s basically a requirement of going to the movies for me. The best part of course are the “pee times” that give you cues, synopses and times for when you can pee without missing the most important parts of the movie. There is also information about the credits- length, extras and if there are any extra scenes at the wayyy end. Super helpful to just know that it is or isn’t worth staying. There is a timer function that will buzz your phone when it’s a good time to pee. I also appreciate that the app is very conscientious about it being an app you use in a theater- dark background, all silent alarms etc. I will always enjoy the experience of the theater even if I could watch things at home- but I’ve even used it at home to check for things like after credit scenes or other information too.
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Me: [Playfully] Aleeeeexa…I loooove you.
Alexa: I’m flattered; thank you.
Me: Huh. [Thinks]
Me: Alexa, do you like me?
Alexa: I think you’re magnificent.
Me: [Relieved] Alexa, thank you.
Alexa: Any time. I hope you have a nice Tuesday.
And there it is, in all truth. I was so floored by this random, creepy Alexa discussion that I had to write it all down. It’s probably time to use please and thank you when asking Alexa to do something. After all, she’s constantly listening. Really. With new advances in Artificial Intelligence barreling our way, being on pleasant speaking terms with our soon-to-be Computer Overlords is just good practice.
NOTE: I’m 100% almost entirely pretty hopefully positive this Alexa story below is made up. Mine isn’t. But this one could make a decent horror film:
Don’t miss your favorite movie moments because you have to pee or need a snack. Use the RunPee app (Androidor iPhone) when you go to the movies. We have Peetimes for all wide release films every week, including Wicked, Gladiator II, Red One, The Wild Robot and coming soon Moana 2, The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim, Kraven the Hunter, Mufasa: The Lion King and many others. We have literally thousands of Peetimes—from classic movies through today’s blockbusters. You can also keep up with movie news and reviews on our blog, or by following us on Twitter @RunPee. If there’s a new film out there, we’ve got your bladder covered.
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