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Movie Review – Countdown

 

Movie Review - CountdownCountdown was a fun little flick. I enjoyed it — there were some scare moments balanced with just enough humor to add to its overall balance.

In today’s world, we are all attached to our phones. They’ve become an extension of our hands. In Countdown, they become your own personal countdown to death.

Yes, there’s an app for that.

It’s a pretty short movie and they did a great job keeping the flow going. No boring moments here.

The part that appealed to me the most was their use of religious figures. Father John rocked the screen. He was awesome! I’ve never seen them take the route Countdown did. He listened to rap music in his study while smoking, and his passion was demons. He was too cool.

If you’re looking for a movie that won’t terrify but simply entertain you, try this one. I’ve got no complaints.

Grade: B+

About The Peetimes: You have 2 choices for this very short movie. I highly recommend the 1st Peetime. The 2nd Peetime contains some character development that comes into play later in the movie.

There are extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Countdown. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (PG-13) for terror, violence, bloody images, suggestive material, language and thematic elements
Genres: Horror, Thriller

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Movie Review – The Lighthouse

 

Movie Review - The LighthouseIt’s no secret I have issues with A24 productions. I have seen them all. I go in with an open mind — and every time but twice I’ve hated them. Spring Breakers and Tusk get a free pass; those entertained me.

When I saw the trailers for The Lighthouse, I was excited. It looked to be right up my alley — great cast, and the setting was set at what I’d call one of my happy places. (I’m a lighthouse lover.) Then in big letters I see it…A24 Productions. I internally groaned and thought to myself that just maybe I’d still like it, because what could go wrong with such a great concept?

I’m still laughing about how wrong I was.

I gave ‘It Comes at Night’ a scathing review, and had a lot of backlash from users on how badly I trashed it. I tried explaining to them that a review is a singular person’s thought on a movie. My opinion. Their opinion was different and that’s totally okay. So here it goes, enter my opinion, stage left.

I did not like this movie. At all. It has taken my number one spot of the worst movie ever made. It made my head hurt and I can still hear the blasted foghorn.

For starters, I couldn’t understand them. The accents used were so over the top that all I heard was gibberish. Enough said there.

My next complaint: the over-used masturbation scenes. Seriously? How many times did we need to see them doing this? Apparently a lot, because there are too many of those scenes. I’m a jaded person; I think I’ve seen every gross thing to come out of Hollywood, and never cringed the way I did last night. I felt dirty watching it and trust me, I’m not a prude. My blood pressure is starting to rise again.

I could pick this movie apart like a turkey on Thanksgiving, but I’m going to stop here. I conveyed my feelings well enough, I think. It was simply dreadful.

Thanks A24 for finally settling an ongoing internal battle. You will never lure me in again. Shout out to my boss — my wonderful brother — there isn’t enough money to get me to do another A24. I’m done.

Grade: F-

About The Peetimes: I have two Peetimes at 29 and 51 minutes. The middle Peetime is a very short ‘Alert Peetime’ containing graphic animal cruelty to a bird.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of The Lighthouse. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for sexual content, nudity, violence, disturbing images, and some language
Genres: Drama, Fantasy, Horror

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Movie Review – Lucy in the Sky

Movie Review - Lucy in the SkyThis was a pretty depressing movie. I left the theater and was so sad about so many things. It’s not a fun story and certainly not an uplifting one either.

I’m one of the movie goers that like to have fun and be carried away into a riveting or even just plain silly story. What Lucy in the Sky gave me was watching an absolutely brilliant, highly motivated woman spiral out of control and ruin her life’s goal.

Portman did a superb job. She encompassed this role with her entire being. She’s simply perfect.

I’m giving this movie an A because of her. Also, it was masterfully directed and had a simple beauty to many of the scenes. Certainly not because it left me feeling happy and alive. Just the opposite actually. This wasn’t my cup of tea, but I wasn’t the target audience.

To the viewers that do enjoy these truthful biopics, I’m pretty sure they nailed it.

Grade: A

About The Peetimes: This movie was a slow starter. Really for the first hour you can catch yourself up if you need to step out of the theater. The last 30 minutes is when the true depth of the movie is shown.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Lucy in the Sky. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for language and some sexual content
Genres: Drama, Sci-Fi

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Movie Review – Jexi

Movie Review - JexiJexi had me laughing from the beginning and it really never stopped. I went to see this movie hoping to take a break from reality and just laugh for a while. I got what I wanted.

This movie isn’t an award-winner, but it wasn’t made to be. This was made for pure entertainment through outrageously acted humor. Some of it’s crass, some of it is silly, and some of it really hits home with today’s world.

Jexi herself was awesome. She had some of the funniest lines. To a certain extent I wouldn’t mind having one myself. Rose Byrne’s voice was perfect. I adore her. The shining stars of this movie were definitively Adam Devine and Michael Pena. Those two guys are funny.

Not much else can be said about Jexi — it’s hilarious. If you want hilarious, I recommend it wholeheartedly.

Grade: A

About The Peetimes: The outrageously funny lines never stop. I did find a 4 minute chunk that had only a few laughs, so I’m recommending you use the 2nd Peetime. The 1st Peetime is for Emergencies only. It’s easy to summarize, but has a super funny conversation.

There are extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Jexi. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for strong/crude sexual content and language throughout, some drug use and graphic nudity
Genres: Comedy

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Movie Review – Judy

Movie Review - JudyI was sitting in the theater watching Judy when I realized I’m the target audience. I grew up idolizing this gifted woman and was well aware of her continuous struggles to rid herself of the demons that seemed to dictate her life. So I feel most qualified to review this movie.

When you see Renee Zellweger’s interpretation of Judy Garland, you’ll see why everyone (that matters) is raving about her performance. Some people (who really don’t matter) are panning Renee’s performance as over-exaggerated and off-key.

I think perhaps these people didn’t grow up knowing the real Judy Garland — they only know Dorothy Gale. Renee’s gesticulations were spot on. And because Renee’s voice didn’t reflect the golden tones of a sixteen year old girl singing about rainbows and such, she was unduly criticized. Director Rupert Goold explained that during 1969, Judy’s voice was older, and the years had not been nice to her vocal cords, nor the rest of her body. In short, Renee nailed it. Move over Oscar #1, Mamma’s bringing home Oscar #2.

I have to say that in my theater the demographics were couples over sixty. I spoke with several couples who found, just as I did, that Renee’s interpretation was spot-on. I fear that movie-goers younger than fifty will not get the same enjoyment as the baby boomers will have. But this does not include folks under fifty who actually have very good cinematic taste.

In all respects, this is an excellent movie; well acted, directed, and written. Also, major kudos to the costume and makeup departments. I see an Oscar nod in their future. BTW, the ending alone is worth the price of a ticket.

Grade: A

About The Peetimes: About midway through the movie I’ve given you a 5 minute break. You may want to take advantage of this Peetime, because it’s the last one, and there’s still about another half hour of the movie left.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Judy. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (PG-13) for substance abuse, thematic content, some strong language, and smoking
Genres: Biography, Drama, History, True life story

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Movie Review – Hustlers

Movie Review - HustlersI’m giving this movie an A for sure. I loved it. Watching these women do their thing was so much fun that I forgot I was working. All of the sudden a little thought popped into my head like, “Hey, aren’t you supposed to be watching for Peetimes?”

So yeah, what they were doing was wrong and illegal, but who am I to judge? I lead a very boring and mundane life on the right side of the law. These women were doing exactly what the little devil on my shoulder whispers in my ear. I of course don’t listen to him, but during Hustlers, I was able to live vicariously through these devilishly, devious women. It was a good time!

Let’s talk about J Lo really quick. Wow! She’s got a body on her that I am so envious of. She could work that pole like a pro. Nicely done, lady.

Everyone has been talking about Cardi B branching out into movies. Well, I gotta say for her first gig, she did great. She doesn’t have a very big part but her character was larger than life. I can see her building a reputation on the silver screen.

Hustlers will make the top of my list for chick flicks. Grab your girlfriends and make a night out of it. A great time will be had by all. Thinking about it, you could bring your boyfriends too; I’m sure they’d see a thing or two that would please them. Wink wink.

Grade: A

About The Peetimes: Hustlers moves pretty quickly, luckily there are a lot of music montage scenes to choose Peetimes from. These 2 should work pretty well for you.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Hustlers. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for pervasive sexual material, drug content, language and nudity
Genres: Comedy, Crime, Drama

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Movie Review – It Chapter Two

 

Movie Review - It Chapter TwoI’ve got so much to say about It Chapter Two, I’m not usually one for long reviews, but this one calls for it. Here we go…

Let’s start off on a positive note.

The beginning absolutely captivated me. I loved how each of the Losers were contacted and asked to come back to Derry. Then we were given glimpses into each of the Losers lives as adults. I really liked that. Eddie’s moment was absolutely hilarious; he grew up to have an intense love of profanity. Bill had grown up to be about what I had expected him to be; it was Beverly’s life that troubled me. I won’t give that away. Richie (Bill Hader) in my opinion stole the spot for funniest character. His sarcastic negativity was priceless. Ben was a bit of a shock, I didn’t see his adult story coming. Let’s just say, “Hot!”

The movie then gathers even more of my attention. The Losers are all now back in Derry. Watching the interaction and reactions of the friends was perfectly done. Mike gathered them all together and his revelations are intensely brought to light.

The Best Part of the Plot

It comes down to the fact that each of the Losers have to find a token of their childhood to sacrifice during a ritual that Mike researched and wants to perform. I won’t say anymore about that. I’m trying to avoid spoilers.

During this shift of the movie, it takes on a surreal feel. Each Loser has “their” thing they are searching for. They are individually done and I thought that was a fabulous way to do it. I chose to not use any of those scenes for Peetimes, as the plot development and character development was at maximum velocity here.

Now we transition into them working together to solve this age-long problem called Pennywise. This was masterfully done, with the exception of Mike and Beverly (Isaiah Mustafa and Jessica Chastain).

Where IT: Chapter 2 Let Me Down

Here’s my first gripe: Isaiah, in my opinion, didn’t have a very strong screen presence. It’s like his expression never changed. He’s a great actor, but I didn’t like him in this. Second gripe: Jessica Chastain is also another great actress, but in It Chapter Two, she didn’t bring the strength and tenacity that young Bev brought (Sophia Lillis). There was no pop to her and I was really looking forward to seeing her rip It up.

Here’s my final gripe….Pennywise. I need to skirt around this as to avoid spoilers, dangit — this is hard to say. Pennywise didn’t drool enough for me; he didn’t use his clipped high pitched speaking tone enough, arrgg… It let me down. This is absolutely not on Skarsgard: his acting was impeccable. It was the writing that faltered here. I’m not crazy about how they portrayed him. That’s all I can say right now.

Now that I’ve got my three gripes out of the way, I can officially say I still loved It 2. The gripes are easy enough to overlook because the positives totally outweigh the negatives. The film had some amazing effects, brutal sounds and hilarious moments. It Chapter Two is certainly good, but didn’t quite do the perfect execution to rate an A.

Grade: B

About The Peetimes: It Chapter Two is packed with action, with almost no lulls. I hope that these 3 Peetimes will help you get thorough this monstrously long movie. (Seriously, check your Peetimes on the RunPee app, and tell everyone you know — this film is almost 3 hours long!)

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of It Chapter Two. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for disturbing violent content and bloody images throughout, pervasive language, and some crude sexual material
Genres: Horror, Clowns (duh)

All the Problems with the Movie It

Who is Who in IT – Chapter 2

Movie Review – Ready or Not

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Movie Review – Don’t Let Go

Movie Review - Don't Let GoMy personal opinion: I loved it. The movie starts off fast and keeps gaining momentum, hurtling us toward an incredible ending.

It’s action packed. The story was interesting and the acting was superb.

I don’t know why so many people are trashing it. I’ve read about thirty reviews talking about how this story has been done before. People are referencing Frequency; sure it’s similar, but helloooo?? Does anyone recall the 11 Halloween movies, or perhaps the 11 Friday the 13th movies? I can think of at least 5 Groundhog Day themed movies. My point is, there are so many movies, that finding a truly original script is becoming almost impossible.

(Unless you’re Quentin Tarantino. He’s original and prefect all the time, every time.)

I’m not going to say one word about the story development. I recommend trying to avoid seeing blurbs about the ending. The surprise of the finale is well worth the effort of avoiding any type of news covering Don’t Let Go.

I’m giving it a solid A. I was pleasantly surprised by it and hope you’ll enjoy it just us much as I did.

Grade: A

About The Peetimes: I highly recommend the 1st Peetime. This movie bounces back and forth in time and it will confuse you, even if you look away for a second.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Don’t Let Go. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for violence, bloody images, and language
Genres: Drama, Fantasy, Horror, Thriller

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Movie Review – Ready or Not

Movie Review - Ready or NotReady Or Not, here I come with my review.

This was an awesome movie. I had so much fun watching it, just like playing hide and seek when I was a kid…kind of…we didn’t have all the cool weapons and no one ever died.

I loved the originality. I’m trying to think of another movie to compare it to, but I’m at a loss. It was refreshing to see something totally unique.

The entire cast brought pizzazz to the screen. I lost count of how many lines I laughed at. The delivery and timing was spot on. That tells me not only were we working with great actors, we had great writing and direction.

Let me mention one more thing without giving out any spoilers. I saw the trailer no less than twenty times. I thought I had a pretty good grasp of what I was going to see. I was wrong. Granted, that never, ever happens (me being wrong) but when it does happen, I don’t usually like it. In this case, I was very pleased.

You’ll have fun with this one. I certainly did.

Grade: A+

About The Peetimes: I have 2 Peetimes for this short movie. The 2nd one is long and has some of the most cringe-worthy scenes, in case that kind of thing bothers you.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Ready or Not. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for violence, bloody images, language throughout, and some drug use
Genres: Horror, Mystery, Thriller

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Movie Review – Good Boys – Raunchy Laughs, but Big Plotholes

Movie Review - Good BoysGood Boys was awkwardly funny. Like really funny. I was worried I was going to pee from laughing so hard, and I can’t RunPee during movies, since I have to get the Peetimes for the rest of you.

There were moments I found myself chastising my inability to hold in my laughter. They pushed the envelope as far as one can be pushed. What I found the funniest was the situations that the boys were getting into was totally over their heads. Them being so young and naive, coupled with the situation, was priceless.

People are screaming over how wrong this movie is. They were scandalized because of the characters being tweens. Sure, it’s not every day you watch little ones swearing like sailors or learning to kiss on a sex doll. But is it any worse than watching criminals kill cops, or a homeless girl turn to prostitution?

There will always be something scandalous on the big screen; that’s what fills the seats. Good Boys is rated R for a reason, folks. Don’t take little Suzy or Johnny; you’re not gonna want to answer their questions afterwards.

The Actors: the Best Part of Good Boys

The actual boys were terrific little actors. Each of them brought just a little bit more spark to the movie. If I were basing my grade on them, it’s an A all the way. My grade faltered a bit due to some gaps in the continuity. There were enough to distract me from completely enjoying the movie.

Good Boys would make a great date night movie, just as long as neither of you are an uptight type. Walk in expecting to see some raunchy jokes, lots of sex toys, and a plot based on drugs.

#DontBringTheKids

Grade: C+

About The Peetimes: Good Boys is a really short movie, and they pack a lot of stuff into each scene, which makes finding Peetimes hard. I chose these 2 because they were easiest to sum up without losing a lot of punch. I’ll warn you though, there is humor in every scene, and I can’t duplicate that in a Peetime.

There are no extra scenes during, or after, the end credits of Good Boys. (What we mean by Anything Extra.)

Rated (R) for strong crude sexual content, drug and alcohol material, and language throughout – all involving tweens
Genres: Adventure, Comedy

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