| Transylmania |
 |
What WAS this? Somewhere between a soft porn flick and a teen-humor gross-out gag film.
The movie seems to want to fall into the American Pie and Something About Mary genres. Don’t be fooled. The script lacks their cleverness but piles on the bodily humor. There are boobies, penises, farts, vomiting, midgets, pot parties, orgies, spurting blood and whatever else you might imagine is funny to immature adults.
There actually IS a plot here to follow, surprisingly. Once the story gets underway (about 45 minutes into the film), there are fun moments with mistaken identities and vampire jokes (“Vait minute – I don’t HAVE reflection!”). Watching Radu sneaking from tree to tree for shade, trying to scare a nonplussed child into giving up her bike was light fun. Pete, as a wanna-be Vampire Slayer, offers a few amiable moments.
The World’s Most Indispensable Movie App
The RunPee app tells you the best times to
run & pee during a movie
so you don't miss the best scenes.
Download the RunPee app.
100% free (donation supported)
The character of Wang eventually stands out as mildly interesting among the rest of the non-entities in this forgettable film.
Why this film didn’t go straight to DVD is a mystery. Perhaps the trendy vampire angle is meant to draw crowds? Well, it didn’t work. I was there on opening day – one of two people in the entire theater. I’ve never had so much room to myself.
Kudos to the producers for filming on location in Romania. The castle offered a rich setting, along with spooky forests, interesting townscapes, bridges, moats and dungeons.
The film gets a D+ for the gorgeous on-location filming and the surprisingly cohesive vampire plot, despite mostly listless acting and endless lame sex/pot/vomit jokes.
What did you think about Transylmania? Share your thoughts about the movie in the comments below..
Don’t miss your favorite movie moments because you have to pee or need a snack. Use the RunPee app (Androidor iPhone) when you go to the movies. We have Peetimes for all wide release films every week, including Moana 2, The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim, Kraven the Hunter, Wicked, Gladiator II and coming soon Mufasa: The Lion King, Nosferatu, A Complete Unknown and many others. We have literally thousands of Peetimes—from classic movies through today’s blockbusters. You can also keep up with movie news and reviews on our blog, or by following us on Twitter @RunPee. If there’s a new film out there, we’ve got your bladder covered.
Leave a Reply