Category: Disappointing
-
Movie Review – Five Feet Apart – Sweet, but just too depressing
—
Yeah, yeah, it’s sweet and touching, but why would anyone subject themselves to a movie like this if they had a choice? I don’t like dramas, because I don’t like watching people suffer and die. Not my kind of film, and I’m annoyed at the entire enterprise. Can I recommend it? No. I just don’t…
-
Movie Review – The Prodigy – No Chemistry, No Creativity
The Prodigy was really disappointing. I’ve seen better movies at Billy Bob’s Drive-In Theater. This is another movie that did a wonderful job of making the trailer look too good to pass up. They got me hook, line and sinker. I was really excited waiting for the movie, then it started. Ten minutes into it,…
-
Movie Review – Replicas
There are two movies coming out this week about dogs. One is A Dog’s Way Home. The other is Replicas, which has no dogs in it, but it is a dog. Question: why does the saying, “This movie is a dog,” imply that a movie is bad, yet we also know this one: “A dog is…
-
Movie Review – Holmes & Watson
Holmes and Watson was really disappointing. Being a huge fan of the Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly comedy duo, I was expecting more. A lot more. I know these guys are amazing together; I personally think this film was simply poorly written. The characters lacked a depth that made you care about them,…
-
Got Lice from Movies & Theater Seats? Steps To Get Rid of Your Lice
I wrote an article about how I, an adult avid movie-goer for RunPee.com, got a gross, itchy, rashy head of lice and nits from my local AMC movie theater. My theater is normally a spotless establishment, but since a lice epidemic has taken the nation, all I can say is: pests happen. People are turning…
-
Rewatch Movie Review – National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
I kind of remember National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation as funnier than it is, through younger and rosier colored glasses. Sometimes things don’t really stand up to the passage of time, and this ‘Vacation’ movie from 1989 seems darker and a little bit meaner than I remember. It’s rather judgmental, taking potshots at the expense of…
-
Virgin Movie Review – A Merry Friggin’ Christmas (2014)
A Merry Friggin’ Christmas was a strange, strange film to watch. It seemed to have the distinctive low production values of a Hallmark Holiday Special, yet somehow boasted the clout and cash flow to hire friggin’ Robin Williams as the co-star. (Not to mention Candice Bergen, in a throw-away role.) What happened? Why was this…
-
Movie Review – Second Act
—
This is a fish-out-of-water story, which is normally a reliable premise for laughs. Unfortunately, it feels like a half-hearted attempt to re-make a modern take on such classics like Working Girl and Pretty Woman. Or the more recent, and very wonderful The Devil Wears Prada. A re-envisioning of an old theme would be fine…
-
Avoid Getting Lice At The Movies (a personal story and a PSA)
This should be a little embarrassing: I’m a grownup after all. But I caught lice at the movies. I don’t feel weird about it – in fact I’m actually glad to know why this rash on my neck wouldn’t go away. This is treatable with a $12 lice-killer from Amazon. There are far more difficult…
-
Virgin Movie Review – Footloose (1984)
Somehow, I’ve never seen the original Footloose before. I did catch the remake a few months back and found it mildly awful. I figured the iconic original would impress me more. It did. But only by a small margin. I cannot figure out why this movie has iconic status, much less be considered a Teen…
